Feeling Cheated...

You know the feeling when you know that your opportunity to do something wonderful is over? That you will never be able to experience something again? Well, I feel that way. After a visit to my OB last week, we discussed future children and labor and delivery and if the occasion was to ever arise and I was pretty much told that I would never be able to deliver a child vaginally again. I would always have to have a c-section from here on out. WHAT? VBAC's are common aren't they? Well, giving my history and the positioning of my children, Dr. Long doesn't want to chance it and will only do section births now. I really feel cheated. I felt that way after having Edison, and I feel that way again. I want to experience labor and birth. HECK yes it hurts, but the outcome is amazing. Our bodies are meant to do this, and now my chances are over to experience one of the most wonderful miracles that women go through. I just cried and cried after he told me that. I don't know.. it just hit me very hard. I don't know for sure if Wayne and I will have anymore children, but if we did, having a c-section, in my opinion, takes a lot of the "fun" out of the experience. Takes away the anticipation of labor, takes away the unknown, and adds the worry of surgery, well.. at least for me. I really just can't express my feelings well about this.. I just feel cheated. And feel that even though that precious child will be the outcome, everyone deserves to have the birth that they want, and I can't ever have that. BOOOOO!

On a side note, I still love my Dr.! :)