Missing Edison

Today I was working at MDO which I do every Monday and Wednesday.. I love it! :) But, I haven't really been away from Edison at all these past 7 weeks and today it really hit me how much I don't want to be away from him at all. I have these feelings with Eden as well. There are days I miss her so much while she is at school.. but it's different because she has to be there. I make the choice to work and be away from Edison and that makes me so sad. I really wish I didn't have to work. I sob over missing a smile, or not getting to feed him every oz he eats during the day. And yes. I even miss changing his diaper. That is when I get some of the best smiles and coo's from him! :( As he lays here in my lap I can't help but wonder if he knows how much he has changed me as a mother over the past 7 weeks? I know he doesn't, but I do know he loves me and needs me and that's a warming feeling. I pray each day that God provides for us to allow me to stay home.. because I know I will never get these moments back from when he's so tiny and amazing.